I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm bleeding and have questions
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize