i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
