can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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