hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
