So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
