She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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