My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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