I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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