no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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