Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
