I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
