I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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