if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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