at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
