I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
The power of my boobs compel you
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
