bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
