Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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