I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
please don't ironically join a cult
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