i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
