I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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