I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
