I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize
