So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
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