There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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