They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
