he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
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