I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
