yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize