We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
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