Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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