is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
