he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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