quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
