CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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