Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
