I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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