ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
