The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
