i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
