That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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