just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
