oh god the rape fog is back!
I want to walk on stilts...naked
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
