Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
