I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
