And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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