dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
