Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
