are you so shy because you have an std?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
that is very illegal...i love you.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
