She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
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