just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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