There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
